Monday, February 14, 2005

THIS POST IS (TRYING TO BE) FUNNY: In a recent post, the very great MoChassid suggested that I might not be welcome at his minyan.

He was joking. How do I know? For starters, MoChassid's minyan is the Nassau Community College of minyanim. ( I almost wrote "the girl you don't want your daughter to grow up to be" of minyanim.) Even misnagdisha liberals (with cruel, yet handsome eyes) can get into MoC's minyan. His statement was OBVIOUSLY a joke, as obvious as the religion and nationality of the Pope, for instance.

Also, this sort of joking is what MoChasid and I do, together with a growing handful of other blogs. (You will remember Satan's harem, for example)

We tease. We poke. We exchange links (the absolute and ultimate sign of respect in the blogosphere.) It's fun. Everyone gets some traffic and no one gets hurt. And, to be honest, it's rather infrequent. Of my 600 odd posts very few (he'd say "not nearly enough!") are about MoC or any of the other bloggers. We cultivate a variety of interests here at DovBear.

So before I continue, permit me to make it clear for the record: I welcome the joking. I strongly encourage the joking. I get it. And I am sure Mo does, too.

However...

It has recently been suggested to me that, in theory, some people might not enjoy the inter-blog bantering that barely passes for humor here at DovBear. Yes, strange but true: in theory, some people are made of paper tissue, and, in theory, they worry that the rest of us are, too. They fret that feelings are being hurt, and the nice, cheerful blogosphere is being made too rowdy and too unpleasant for the delicate souls among us.

They want it to stop.

Though I'm tempted to pass the milk, and to dismiss their, theoretical, dressing down, these fragile scolds are also people readers. Their views must be considered. After all, DovBear strives to be a customer-service focused blog, and always tries to be super-responsive to the needs of its beloved readers.

Therefore, in deference to this, theoretical, opinion, I am very pleased to announce a policy change, a policy change I urge all blogs to adapt immediately.

No more inter-blog bantering.

Additionally, I announce with deep indignation and righteous anger that I found MoChassid's joke about not welcoming me into his minyan to be offensive. In retribution, I am hereby calling for a boycott of all MoChassid products and services. My anti-MoChassid Manifesto (working title: "Making the Blogosphere More Peaceful By Publicly Denouncing Other Bloggers") will appear just as soon as Mis-Nagid, manifesto writer to the stars, finishes it. (And he'd better not just swap the word "Torah" for "MoChassid" in one of his own manifestos. I paid for an original work.)

Please note that the preceeding was a joke. I have not been hauled over the coals by anyone, in theory, or otherwise, and I'd chew off my own arm before I'd do anything that would hurt a blogger like MoChassid. He rocks.

Sigh

Wouldn't it be great if along with the improved commenting system, blogger could give us some sort of closed-captioning for the humor-impaired?